Hoah.. I'm Tired of Thinking Too Many Things.. =__="

I feel like I'm changing a lot this week. A nice change. Where I'm starting to fit in with my family and I got calmer at school and I wanna study well. [Even though still badly lazy. Haha]. Listening to the english version of Tong Hua(Fairytale) a lot. It has a really deep meaning for me.

Nearly there will be a midterm test so i must study well.. Gotta boost my scores since I did so bad in this 2nd semester's 1st n 2nd wave tests =__=". I'm still confused about entering science or social class.. It's so confusin' that I did bad in both -.-" Maybe science.. But science class's guys are mostly so lame and don't really know how to have fun. But if I enter social class it'd be too noisy and I wouldn't be focus, and the subject is so "zz". Arrgh.. I'd rather pick the language class but it's only in SanMar and Carolus.

Speaking about SanMar, yesterday I went to PTC and I met a lot of SanMar students. First I met Nina (Andrew's fren) and Fank-kii and Nina told me about SanMar Pensi. Yeah, PTC is full of SanMar students cuz they were Pensi there and we can enter it for 50K. Hell no. There'd be musical drama and things.. And I'm not really into that except for the dance. Haha.. Wait, who teaches SanMar hip hop? Oh yeah... The TTP and Takupaz Dance Crew are there so no need to call instructor. Hmm.. If I move to that school there's no dancing with them. I'm not their member and I'm an AOG Crew member. And even if I can dance with one of the crew for school events, the other will make me enemy cuz they said TTP and Takupaz are enemies.. =__=" Nah way! But yesterday I saw SanMar students are nice in fashion especially for the boys. Korean style, even not branded. That's so my style. But anyway, my mom won't let me enter a Chatolic school.. Haha..

Yesterday I bought a white pants. It's not really nice. Singapore has nicer white pants but I didn't buy it cuz it's bottom part is too low for me but when I see this one in update is the same. I guess they're all the same -.-" But nevermind la. It only cost 400K when I thought I saw the price tag in atom that says 500K. Haha.. Neat. ^^ When I finished purchasing, I saw this crazily Korean cloth with scarf and I regret I didn't see it the first time > < And I want this skinny jeans.. And lime yellow short pants.. But I think I should hold it for now. Many things for my fashion life. But I need more, a LOT more things for my streetdance life.
Gotta keep money running..

This Is Me.

Today I watched Camp Rock (Sydney told me to watch it) and it has a really deep meaning that bangs my soul. About her being not real to people and cover what she is shy about.. It's totally me. And then the way she admits the truth and she gets to higher ground.. It really hits my head.. And this song is playing in my soul.

"I've always been the kind of boy
That hid my face
So afraid to tell the world
What I've got to say

But I have this dream
Right inside of me
I'm gonna let it show, it's time
To let you know
To let you know

This is real, this is me
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, now
Gonna let the light shine on me
Now I've found who I am
There's no way to hold it in
No more hiding who I wanna be,
This is me

Do you know what it's like
to feel so in the dark
And to dream about a life
Where you're the shining star
Even though it seems
Like it's too far away
I have to believe in myself
It's the only way


This is real, this is me
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be, now
Gonna let the light shine on me
Now I've found who I am
There's no way to hold it in
No more hiding who I wanna be,
This is me"

It's so deep and meaningful for me.. And it's all about me.. I have to break my limit if I wanna be "the guy". I don't wanna be a bird in cage just for the rest of my life, I have to move on. From now on, I'll try my hardest not to pose or disguise.. I wanna show everyone what and who I really am. It's all about Reinhard, and his style.

And about my story, it's not that I don't love you anymore. It's that I don't wanna love you. It's enough. Thanks for acting like you care, and trying to make me feel like I'm the only one. But I know that I'm not the only one. You've got thousands of love, even if you say they're just as close as that. But no thanks, it's too itchy for me. Well, that's my itchy level. And if you think it's too low, go get another guy. Just forget about the promise "We'll be the last". I don't really care if it means breaking promise or things but I think it's worth it cuz I'll try to forget everything about us and our story. Just..forget about it. I'm tired of this hanging thing. You don't really care and so I am. Live our own happy life, shall we? I won't be a burden and you won't be my burden. [enigmaside-rei.blogspot.com]

I don't wanna know what it is. I don't want you to show me.

" Always tell me to do things itself GENERALLY do. I hate it when I remember magic words. Since the period of bearing thatgadfruit. "Believe that it'll be like fairytale?" TALK THAT SHIT. I don't wanna know what L is. I don't want it to show me. Well, relax now do it what want, cuz I don't really care and I won't remember having the feeling yet I won't share the feeling again. I'm tired of everything regarding it.."

Yesterday there was AOG Dance practice. This week we're physically trained. We do the warm-up like usual, running around the hall. Then Kak Sem divide the girls and the boys to a small running competition. I'm with Erick only (the boys are only us for now -.-). And then
we played another game. There are 5 of us, so, the 4 must do kayang and standby in a row and the one must crawl below, then when he/she finished, she must do kayang on the back, and the front most guy/girl must crawl, and so on till we reach the end of the hall. It's really tiring, but fun. The last game was to make a row again, 4 of us kneel, the one scot-zigzagged passing the 4 person, and when he/she reach the end, she must jump accross our body, one by one. The girls was so anxious. Ichel actually stomped on Chachia hard.. Haha.. And then after a session, it shows that we finished it in 1:27. Kak Sem then told us to make a bet! We made a bet that we can be faster. If we can do it faster, then Kak Sem will go push-up and sit-up 20 times each. If not, then five of us will. Then we arranged a silly strategy and I told them that the one who's faster should be backward so the slowest go first. Actually I'm not getting any point in this but in things people always do it like that.. Haha.. Then we go. Ichel first (where she stomped on everyone and every jump there will be the backsound "ouch!" XD), and then Chachia, Julia, Erick, and me. Along the way when the girl's afraid of getting stomped, Kak Sem always said "BELIEVE IN YOUR FRIENDS.". So be it (but still getting stomped
right after xD). Then when it's my turn Kak Sem announced that it's already one minute so I speed up, I don't wanna lose. And then the last stomp.. "BOOM". 1:18. Kak Sem lost the bet. And then I just realize that the meaning of "the fastest one should be the latest one" is... The fastest one can charge his speed up, cuz he believe in himself that he's fast. When the judget told the remaining time, he won't go panic, but go whoosh cuz he won't want to lose. Different with the slow one. Knowing that he's slow, he'll panic and getting confused in his own speed. So now I understand.. ^^ Then we go practice the choreo, and Kak Sem arranged the position a lot on the Groovy and Locking so I got really confused.. And then after the practice I told Juju's mom that I can only attend a practice once a week. So I can't enter the regular class that's on Thursday. Then she told us to move the AOG practice to Thursday. (what the--?) AOG moved their practice schedule just because of me.. Oh well, ego-maniac me. Anyway, I'll study for real in regular class so I can follow their skill level > <. In this dance life I'll put everything I can and so my hopes and dreams.. Today, my bones and muscles are really tired and my feet feels hurt to move. My backbone too (where Ichel stomped me LOL -.-). Nawwgh. In school I was so sleepy and tired that I always feel like sleeping during the day. This day felt so tiring. And then in home I just sit on my bed and suddenly I fell asleep. Haha.. In the night I ate in Fish&Co, where the waiter said that the promo "Buy 1 Get 1 Free New York Fish & Chips" will last for the future. Wowie, should eat there alot x) Wakaka.. Then we watched Percy Jackson's. It's the 2nd time I watched it. It felt better than when I watched it earlier, cuz earlier I talked too much that I didn't really pay attention to the movie.. Haha.. Verbal guy ruwckkz x). Then, I'm home.. Tomorrow I think I'll go nowhere cuz all my friends can't go to the mall. Well, maybe I'll go and shop alone. Shopping Friday..coorny ~__~" What should I buy? Not shoes, I'll make twins with AOG Crew. Maybe cardigan.. *.hoaahhmmm* sleepy ;p Imma go to sleep -.+ Krumping soul singing.. "Get to know me. Imma krump the gadfruit till it's totally scaterred. Yeah, I'll take i to my SLAUUUGHTEERRR HOUSE.. Taste my ZUUPER BUCKS like the song 2 Buck 4 TV"

Middle Line Happiness Meter.

So many things happened the past week.
I was on a fight again with my mom and things and I planned to rush outta home from real then my mom found out and bla3. And it makes me know more about me: I really hate melancholy. It feels so disgusting. I don't really like family feeling and things.

On Thursday, I went to Sutos with Citra, big bro, nyo, and Noph. Noph is our new friend from Facebook. And we watched Valentine's Day as I planned. It was a delight drama movie but not really a 5 Star one. Just starring many top actors. There were Fosho boys with us too (D'ace, Lee-ex, and Vitch) but we didn't really get along.

Saturday (yesterday), I went to Sutos with my sis and her boyfriend. We watched Wolfman but it sucks. And I met Nel and Val too. Then I went to Platinum Grill, Julia's birthday party. It actually started on 5.30 pm but I came on 6.30. But many guys were late so it's no problem. Besides, the food came on above 8. There were about 8 menus there including appetizers. It was a really nice place, like houses on hills and there were sounds of frogs as BGM. The sounds were so funny and different from the other sounds.. Hahaha

Update--
MOOD : Tired
SCHOOL : Bad
Love : Weird
Friends : OK
Money : Fine
Dance : Well
Fashion : Nice

Huff..

Happy Chinese New Year.. And Valentine's Day.

"I can love. I can hate. I don't know which is the one. I don't want to love anymore, enough. I don't want the feeling to be back. I want everything to stay like this, even though my heart resists sometimes. I am missing you.. But just forget and stay away."

Today is double day. Chinese New Year [Which will be my starting line of this 2010] and Val Day. [Reivaldi's day.. Haha]

The hong bao this year is less than last year and it seems really insufficient to go shopping if I purchase the Supra Foam shoes and the white Monkey Cargo. Whew.. They cost real lot. Are there no discount for Last Minute's big family and friends? TT Maybe I'll think double times for the shoes. I still wanna buy a lot for my fashion life. I wanna buy this and that.. Really a money waster.

Yesterday we went to Virgin's birthday and tricked her that everyone aren't coming except me and Gaby cuz they thought it's too boring and Virgin cried. And then I held Virgin in J.Co and we shared stories and I pretend to go somewhere with my "other friend" and I actually took Val and Nel back to Virgin with the cake. Virgin cried again and I can see her smiling face :)
Then we went to the cinema and watched Percy's Lightning Thief. It's a nice movie and funny too LOL. Then we ate at AmGrill and I really loved their Salad Bar. Like eating with no end. But I didn't eat much cuz somehow I feel full already. We joked a lot, took photos and I forced Mark to go crazy but he didn't. He's a cool and calm type, not like me AT ALL. Seems like he's a boss and I'm just a crazy street nigga. (Hell yeah. Waddya want wif me, dawg? Piss yerself off! LOL) And then Virgin's family picked us and we joked a lot in the car. Onel started a quiz about brand and he asked about underwear too! LOL. Not just that, Virgin's family is so fun, up to date and friendly. A big thumb for her family. Anyway..
HAVE A JOKEY BIRTHDAY, GIN!

Whoa.. This and That Makes My Head Go Boom!

So much problems and business these days.
The most disturbing one, is my cellphones. The Sony one is on service center since December and they told me it will be finished in a month. Then I came back and suddenly they said it's can't be started! BANG! I must wait again for 4 days but now it's already a week and tomolo I will surely call them. Damn. And then my N95 too, it often gets its LCD blank and whoosh, on again at times. Lurks~~ And it can't send any sms! So I must call if I wanna talk. Wasting my credit.
2nd, AOG crew. I have to keep up with them and in order to do that, I must work extra hard, 3 times harder than they do. I'm learning a concept that they learned already and used for a competition. Well, yesterday I practiced with them and gosh it's obvious that I'm the most tense and clumsy one. I always forgot the moves and the position order. It really makes me feel guilty. Like I'm slowing down their process to a new choreo. Next Tuesday I must practice double times at Julia's dance house.
3rd, Last Minute's regular class. I really wanna join starting at March. Cuz all the AoG crew already joined. Ichel, Chachia, and Julia graduated from LM last year. Erick just graduated. Betet has just leveled up to Intermediate. Me? I haven't do anything! But if I join the regular, I really will be double busier than now. Practice with AOG at Wednesday, and then regular class at Thursday or Saturday. Besides, my mom and dad won't want me to go doubling my business like that. They don't have much time to take care of me going to LM"s homebase. Hey, mom's talking about buying me a car yesterday. DANG I need it right away. Whatever car, I just NEED a car.
Then, my needs. I listed the things I need, and it's a real scary list. I must buy this and that this and boom-puck-puck-boom-puck-puck-boom.They're all above 200k and it feels scary looking at my list. At Sunday will be Chinese New Year and then my new year cash will go like "whoosh" and then I go beggar again. Arrgh!! This month I already wasted A LOT money for my dance. And after this I will waste A TON for it too. I'm buying the shoe in LM Store which will be around 600K, and then I will go photo studio with AOG Crew, and then buy 2 cargo pants which will cost around 500K, and then a lot of tees for dance practices which will waste around 300K, and then if possible, regular class in LM for 500K then 100K a month. Yeah, and that's still just for my dance life. What about my fashion and other life ? -__-"
Then, many school assignments is on the road. Now I must learn this song to sing tomorrow..

Pixie Lott - Use Somebody
by Kings of Leon

Oh whooaa oh oww (2x)

I've been roaming around
Always looking down at all I see
Painted faces fill the places I can't reach
You know that I could use somebody yeah
You know that I could use somebody yeah

Someone like you and all you know and how you speak
Countless lovers undercover of the street
You know that I could use somebody yeah
You know that I could use somebody yeah

Someone like you whoaa ow whoaa ow (2x)

Off in the night while you live it up
I'm off to sleep
Waging wars to shake the poet and the beat

I hope it's gonna make you notice yeaah
I hope it's gonna make you notice yeah

Someone like me ohh whooaa oh
Someone like me oooh whoaaa whoow

I'm ready now (repeat)

Someone like you
You know that I could use somebody yeeaaah
You know that I could use somebody yeaeah
whooa oh

I've been roaming around up
Looking down at all I see

A nice song of the L.A. style workshop, the lyrical hip hop part.. It's really deep and when I sang this, Sydney said I enjoyed. Hehe.. Okay, enough yelling rei. Just try to arrange your schedule.. I hope I can divide my times well. I really need someone to arrange my schedule.. Huhu

Feeling a New Dance Life.

Yesterday and the day before I attended Mike Rock's International Streetdance Workshop at MSC.

The first day I came late and good thing I meet Popthin' Minute (Ce Yustine)  directly at the stairs. And she gave me the ID tag and I joined the class. I was late that I was so confused about the opening moves and started learning from the middle. It was a Lyrical Hip Hop Class (groovy). The song was really deep and nice, like "And you, my love, has gone.. So fly away nananana.. To promise you, to promise anyone" but it was too fast for me and I couldn't follow it well. I always looked at D-Phobia Minute (Doni) and asked him a lot. And then I danced barely and the session ended with.. A painting session. It's a session where everyone should get a pose, and Mike dances first, then he'd touch a person and the person who posed should dance freestyle, and then he will touch the next person to freestyle, and then next, next, next. Geez, I krumped with just bang bang bang!
And then the 2nd session started. It was Hip Drop Class. This time, Ichel, Chachia, and Ju_Ju came in the middle of the class and I moved from near D-Phobia and Pig Minute (Ko Leo) to their side. Then I watched Chachia and she's still an oh so cool streetdancer for me. Ju_Ju too. The Hip Drop Class was worse for me than the 1st class 'cuz it's WAAAAY faster. Then... Freestyle again! I krumped again but it felt not right. I should've bust my electric and isolation move :(
And then break time again. Me, Chachia, and Ichel ate a bad fried rice and chatted a lot. I feel a bit closer to them since we joked a lot. But still, they're a lot better than me -.-. Then, I was so curious that I asked them.. "Does AOG's choreo is as hard as this hip drop one??" And good thing they directly said "NO LAAA!! =___=" Phew.. I thought my life was done. Haha
The 3rd session class started.. L.A. Style Class. It's a really good class and the moves are sooooo enjoyable and I can keep up well. :D The music was like, "I got a Gucci on my shoes (shoes). Ice around my neck. Ooh c'mon girl and bla3'" It was  really a smooth dance. And it ended with freestlye again. Someone touched Ichel and she danced directly to the front and freestyled in front of the mirror where everyone can watch her. I thought, "Oh no. Ichel maybe will touch me. Or if not, she'll touch Ju_Ju and Ju_Ju will touch me. Or Chachia." Oh God! I was really nervous then b'cuz after that Ichel touched Ju_Ju went to the front too, and then Chachia too! And suddenly Chachia..touched me!! And God I was so confused and I automatically moved to the front cuz every AOG member did. In front, I krumped at first, then when the music sang "Lalalalalala~" I waved all the part of my body and then everyone applaused me!! > < Good thing it is! But after that I went blank and I isolated and then went back and touched MG Minute. Whew.. But it's still a good thing that I matched my dance with the music ^^

2nd Day.
I came alone. All alone. I got no friends there. Well, I got Miss_B (ce Linda),  D-Phobia, and the others actually but they're gathering with the whole Last Minute Crew and I won't be inside. I'm still a newcomer student for them =_=" Then I tried to talk and befriended with a guy named Samuel. Well, my first new friend in this workshop :D Haha.. The first class is House Class. It's similiar to b-boy and I danced like a b-boy then ko Leo told me I should like bouncing instead of actually toprocking. Well, then I couldn't do the bouncing thing cuz I got used to toprocking already. (City Warrior's ex-student, duh) When I thought the class is over Mike added some moves with all the king tutting and I really loved it!  And then the session ended..with no freestyle.
The 2nd session was an L.A. Style Class again but Mike combined it with lyrical hip hop. We learned the moves for the song like Michael Jackson's song which says "So I say thank you in my eyes. Ooh baby. Her (ooh!)" Like that. Mike wanted us to absorb the deep song's meaning. Yeah.. Dance with the heart of the music. But we couldn't do well. So Mike gave us another 2nd song, the fully lyrical hip hop one. Pixie Lott's song. The song was soooo deeep and sad like "I've been waiting around and looking around you're all I see.. Nanananana......... You know that I can use somebody..Yeah.. You know that I can use somebody.. Yeah.." It was so deep that I danced with heart, even though my skill isn't that high, but I really wanted to burst dancing with this song.
Before the 3rd class I ate alone. Whew..

3rd class, Hip Drop Class.
Whoa! Hip Drop again! Nah way, I thought it will be like the day before where it's crazily fast and thing but it wasn't!! As Mike said, it was a magic dance and it was so smooth and I LOVED IT SO MUCH. The dance was so enjoyable and I seriously danced and absorbed the music's heart. I learned from MG Minute alot. She's a kind and good streetdancer :) Whoa, the dance was so meaningful. The music was full of piano tones where the move will be like playing piano, slow-mo, and the "whoosh" effect. Wow.. It was a spectacular and tremendous streetdance..

Then after the dance we took photos with Mike Rock and prayed for him and said that we love him and he cried. It was a dramatic farewell. Then me and Miss_B took photos with him (Karin Jolie Minute took it! :D) and said goodbye..

Whew.. I learned a real lot of things from these 2 days. Really lot. About my streetdance life, social life, and my life itself. My dance skill boosted too and I thank God I can join this workshop. Thanks God you gave me the opportunity..
Tomorrow there will be an AoG practice and Blank Minute (Kak Sem) told me to come. Kay.. I hope I can dance well with the whole AOG crew.. My new streetdance life starts.. ^^

So many things..

So many things have happened since I stepped my foot in Singapore up until now that I'm back in Indonesia. For example, this is the most terrifying and buzzing one. I hated my so called aunt so much. Full of blabbering.. I don't really like that kinda person. She always judge me the negative way, without knowing anything about my life and how I work. You don't know anything at all about me.. So don't act like you're that close with me so that you could insult me anyway you like. You led me to a big problems with my mom, you know. When she slapped me and I got crazy for some time, and then I wanted to run away without caring about going home that day to Indonesia.. It's all because of you. You ruin my life, you ruin my family. You ruin my style. My mom told me to cut my hair and bla3.. It's all because of you. Maybe you're a good one in everyone's life. But in my life, you're a bad threat that I don't really wanna keep in touch with.

Mom's biceps is torn, and it needs to be operated. But mom's still afraid of operation, so she still asks for more doctors if it can be cured by only therapy. More doctors said she doesn't need any operation.. But Singapore doctor said she needed one. I hope that she actually needs only therapy.. Operation is scary, you know.

In Singapore I bought a lot of things for friends. I wasted more than S$100 for them and I really regret it. I should've spend more money for myself. But it felt good though giving my friends something, when they're not going to Singapore any nearly.. I bought a magic cup for me which can change colors when hot water is poured, then I bought twin tees. One twin with Reval, it's a Cotton On tees. Cotton On is everywhere in the city and I bought tees a lot there. I really love their style. And I bought a Giordano V-neck and long sleeve, which is a LOT cheaper than it is in Indonesia. And suddenly I found Topman's outlet and I remember Onel telling me that it has a lotta good tees. And I bought 4 of them. One for Onel [the neck style is the same with my big bro, just different size and colors], one for big bro, and two for me. I love this bubble gum colored Topman tees with black on one side and white on the other sleeve edge. It's a unique thing. Then the last day I went to Far East Plaza, which really looks like Mangga Dua and it has A LOT cool clothes, wearing, bracelets, rings, necklaces, shoes, etc. WOW. But that time my money is already wasted till S$120, so I only bought one cloth [a cool one with weird cardigan set and a scarf], and a LOT of bracelets plus one ring and a cool school bag. And I didn't forget to buy a buffday present for virgin and a Merlion choco for Thya..

Whew.. I shopped a ton in Singapore, but din go to Sentosa Island. Hmm..
For school, I think I can keep up well. Today I did the physics and accounting test nicely. And the score for Bahasa came out and I got 98.. The highest in X.6 and X.7. Dunno for the other class.. Bravoooo... Thanks God You gave me a really chatty mind. Haha
Another renewed hiphop schedule...
Tomorrow, 4th Feb '10
-First AoG Dance Practice, 4.30-5.30 p.m.
I hope I can keep up.. Won't wanna be the foolest.

Friday and Saturday, 5-6 Feb '10 3.00-9.00 p.m.
-Mike Rock's International Dance Workshop
Can't wait to learn a ton new things :D

OTHER THAN THAT
Dance practice almost everyday after school...
For UBAYA and PopMie dance competition.

And then Virgin's buffday at 13th February..
Wowie. I'll wear the twin tees. Hehe
Okay I think that's all to write..
Let's just hope that this month goes well :)